A Desert Song
by Don'tEvenHaveAGun
Summary: They'll find her like a flower in the desert; vibrant even after all the sun's heat. (Post-Destroy/ Short series)


**A Desert Song**

**Word Count: 3,133**

**A/N: (Recommend reading this first): **This series will consist of possibly three chapters that document the short time after post-destroy ending: What's going on now, the encounter of the crew, and the future. It was something I wanted to put up to make me feel better after watching the destroy ending and I guess this is my way of interpreting. (Forgive me) Hah.

_They were crying when their sons left  
God is wearing black  
He's gone so far to find no hope  
He's never coming back_

Rumor was – when they found her body, she was cradled around Anderson's form. Ruined, beaten, but stared on very much alive. Smiles draping, blood smeared against chapped lips. It was her mother, Admiral Shepard to cradle her form, stepping over rubbish, crunching metal, and toiling burnt ash under her heel. The Admiral was speechless, nuzzling her face into the fiery hairs of her daughter's riddled body.

People parted like the ocean when they watched the older Shepard move across the fields with her daughter in arms. They saluted, they dropped their hats, and revolved their guns to the ground. Battle is over, and war lives on upon the young lips of the fatherless.

Propaganda is very much alive, flashing in the distant of rundown businesses, the name repeating, revolving letters plastered in white _Commander Jane Ann Shepard. _

The Admiral's hat is dipped below her eyes, studying the steady form of her daughter's green-mist eyes. Jane's eyes were blank, blood seeped to pour from the side of her jaw, and she silently pleaded to the Heavens till dawn to swallow her whole. Armor cracked, a pole protruded from her side to stop the bleeding out process.

Admiral Shepard could feel it, that her daughter would never touch the bases of sane anymore. That her pure-eyed, daddy's girl was diminished and resulted to the core of survival. And for that, she chocked and couldn't carry on her own daughter, falling to her knees and adverted her eyes to the swarms of men that ran around to help carry her out. She's been dead, always has been dead even before they threw fuel to the fire that she was the mad one, a mockery in the eyes of the council. Damn them all to Hell. Her mind resulted to acid dealings.

They'd chant that she's alive, that she's romanced death enough to know that Shepard was meant to live properly now. She was breathing, but never uttered a word to her mother. Dreams were made through her hair, clutching the bases of ginger-spiced hair, running her fingers through her daughter's locks, cradling her child's face into her rummaged clothing. Coated in all her least favorite colors: Jane's blood.

Upon opposite sides of her body, she is tugged by unlikely survivors that survived the trails, that's lost their own along the way. It was Miranda and Jack who held the Admiral's ground, they argued that they knew the Commander better than any man around her. That they tagged along to rebuild, to teach, and to find the Commander dead or alive.

They made their promise. And a promise well kept.

**-x-**

Joker is flipping the switches, his voice droned out the com-channel, "We are ready to lift." He keeps his voice steady and he knows if he mutters long enough he'll repeat to practice and remember the idea of mourning. For he – has lost a love, and he's lost a family member. Not by blood, but through the possibilities of all those years bonding.

He fiddles over the plaque that's engraved in white, _EDI. _He strums his emotions, though, settles his eyes upon the void of stars that swarm and swallow the ship as whole. He can feel her in every corner, though her voice is never clear upon his self-conscious. He dabbles upon madness, hands wanting to slam across the vibrant orange of the control panel. Not once has he shifted his gaze to the empty seat to the far right.

Eyes hungry and very much hollow.

"Damning, huh?" Joker doesn't turn around to the accent of the flange in Garrus' voice. Though, it's gentle enough to smooth out his sea that threatened to rip down his mind. He was swallowing tidal waves of sobs.

Garrus was always so collective, always so keen to keep his emotions in check – even in these times he questioned the very nature of Turians and their battle prowess. "I don't see how you do it." Joker murmurs, and Garrus is aware enough of Human interactions to sense Joker's discomfort, no need, everyone was either locked away or busied themselves with work. Drowning out the very mention to resolve the very conflict of EDI and Shepard.

Liara refuses to leave her chambers, James prides himself and tends to pull-ups, Cortez only sits in the shuttle and lets his hands roll over the handles; sinking in his crying, dying just a little more, Tali, Kenneth, Gabby, and Adams sleek down in engineering; not even a sound peeped from them – they tend to mourning through brainpower. Kaiden observes the masses, taking to second in command through the power of rank, and Javik, well, he mentions that they fought brilliantly, though his eyes betray something more, something unfamiliar even for him, a silent salute.

"A sad way to look at it. Turians are brought up to believe – everyone dies. Even if we can't accept it. Honestly, I truly don't know how I'm walking around myself. Humans are much more delicate." Garrus is easy to choose his words, but he's been around Shepard too long to retort to his militaristic ideals. He was gravely off the edge, though, held his position erect. He's loved her for too long, though, not promised to love her forever like he tended to.

"Have they given you her plaque yet? Can you fucking believe they expect us to place their names up! EDI's body is in the fucking Cargo Bay, and, and Shepards –!" Joker freezes, his hands slamming against the control panel, keying in several alarms to only settle with a touch and a brush of fingers, "We have no idea where she is. No signal, nothing. I – left. I left. IleftIleftIleft." Garrus doesn't flinch, only watches how Joker breaks down in front of him, and the feeling of atoning natures drives Joker to the bleak, mad state.

Joker settles, then drawls his hands to the sides of his face. "I left."

"And we told you to. It's our faults – it's what she told us. And yes, I only received her name this morning." Survivor's guilt of leaving a mate ate at the burnt-out cop. He understood everything that was riddling through the confines of Jokers deliria. He wasn't prone to show it, not now, not in front of prying eyes to witness his moment of great weakness. If – anything was storybook, like the ones she use to tell him every day back during the SSR 1 days, then she'd live and he'd promise the ritual of her ridicules marriage customs.

Just to say it happened. Just for the hell of it.

**-x-**

"Heard you owed Commander Shepard quite a bit of debt."

"I owe her my own damn life." The Asari slyly replys to the Admiral. Blue flash glares match up with a hologram of the spitting Image of the said Commander. Aria moves across the channel, studying the lingering eyes of the older Shepard, lips plastered the same way the Commander held hers'. Bittersweet, hinting charming in the mix. "What can I do for _you?" _Aria's voice slithered and seeped in her own venom – only by nature and nothing personal.

"Stable conditions on my daughter's behalf. The Alliance is capable of space travel – we just need a better place to stabilize her. Without human interaction such as the bitter minded and news crews that have attempted broadcasting on whatever air they can reach. The favor is – keep her existence of her life on a down low. Maybe she'll enjoy the life of normal tastes."

Aria chuckles under the Admiral's ways. Humored that such a stubborn human such as the Commander was still able to hold a flame of life. Hell, she was tempting enough and oozed the essentials of power. Aria crossed her arms against her chest, rocking upon heel to walk closer to the image of blue that hologram in the middle of her courters. "I have several contacts on Shepard's behalf. The Krogan would be your best bet – I'll send you detail on transmissions. Hell, hopefully not too busy with their little breeding victories. All thanks to your daughter."

"They wouldn't croak about my daughter's existence?"

Aria strokes her own ego, strumming her blue lips into a wicked smile and shakes her head, "I know Wrex. Damn, I know Wrex. And if it has anything involving the very existence of _our_ little Commander, he'll keep his trap closed. Rip a couple of heads off just for the hell of the thought. Though, humor me Admiral. What should I tell her little band of girl scouts?"

"Find them. They were shaken from course from the Crucible. Their transmission distorted and their whereabouts lost. I'm actually worried on their affairs, in fact, a whole damn galaxy is searching for the heroes. If you catch hold of them – direct them to me."

Aria glares, then nods her understanding, firm lips pulling into perfect blue lines. "One question, Admiral."

"Of course." The Admiral straightens her form, erecting herself in front of her newest contact.

"Why? Why would you spend your sweet time contacting a well-known pirate? The leader of Omega, the one who holds a leash on all the infamous and damn-ill merc-groups?"

The Admiral's mouth goes dry under the watchful eyes of the Asari, arms drawn in, and waiting for an answer. "Assuming you know how to keep your men in line, and assuming what I've read about your history with my daughter – I know you're powerful and I know you can make people disappear."

Aria gives a wicked laugh, a laugh that echo's against empty floors, "You Shepards say the sweetest things."

**-x-**

She doesn't speak a lot. Eyes glazed over ruined promises and troubled sobs of children crying off in the distance. Her mood swallows her like the ocean when she feels slender arms wrap around her waist, and her mother's chin settling on her shoulder.

"Hey there, Ginger-snap." Her little pet name rings just as calm as her father use to speak it. Subtle and yet so beautiful. Shepard settles under foreign hands, though, only nods to her mother's existence and the safety of loneness secured in a ramshackle hospital room.

"You know today I heard several birds chirping. Like the ones back on earth – sort of strange, and damning to say. Though, with time Ginger-snap, I can feel that galaxy taking a turn for a better – because of you." Shepard only sighs to her mother's words, her body relaxing against her mother's uniform, as her chest presses firmly and protectively against her back. The scent of grain is so pleasant against recycled air.

Admiral Shepard is silent for the moment. Raveled in the tender touches of her older daughter, heeding and indulgencing of the selfish comforts of family warmth. The Admiral would cringe that this time was drawing to a close and when she'd have to send her daughter off after arrangements are set in stone.

The Admiral would begin again, "Also – I ran upon some of your favorite foods, the ones that you'd always ask your father for when we were on shore leave. Cranberry juice and chocolate orange. Hell, I remember when you use to go crazy over those. I hated both of them of course, always thought Cranberry juice tasted bitter and I never cared for the texture of Chocolate – but you'd know."

The Admiral ripped a painful chuckle through her ribcage of her daughter's dawning silence and post-dramatic tendencies. She'd nuzzle her jawline against the flow of fire-colored hair that draped like waterfalls off her daughter's shoulder.

She'd quickly disconnect from her daughter when she heard the door sensors go off and slide to let whoever in. The clicking of heels rounded the corner of Shepard's bed and the Admiral found herself asserting her proper position in straightening her back.

Miranda's voice broke, though lifted her arm to Shepard's eyelevel having her omni-tool scan her life signs and running studies over the properties of her cybernetics. The light flashed from her arm, running once and scanning once over Shepard's slumped over form, "How are you feeling Shepard?" Miranda hinted tenderness, pinging over the board of her omni-tool and taking note to the Commander's nodding head.

"Jack got her to eat something today. Noting – only being oatmeal, but that's something." Miranda nods to the Admiral's silken voice, moving her arm down to only cradle underneath Shepard's chin, checking both sides of Shepard's face.

"Her cybernetics truly saved her life. The way her skin healed is like she never seen the days of battle." Miranda's fingers trail lovingly down the Commander's jaw. "Have you briefed contact with Tuchanka? Have you spoken with Urdnot Wrex?"

"I have. Though, Aria will be the one taking her from us to deliver her to the Urdnot clan, said something about letting her stay in the closer female clans to help raise children. I certainly can't believe I'm accepting this – that…"

"We all do things to protect those we love. God knows I have, and I figure Shepard knows also – even if she doesn't acknowledge it." Both women watch Shepard sit there, stunned, eyes staring off into utter void.

**-x-**

"_We haven't had the best relationship." _Kaiden starts off slow, slowly taking note in how Garrus' mandibles flick then click out once against his face. Dawning off, trailing into unknown valleys of deep thought to the human's voice.

"I suppose." Garrus starts out, sleeking back into the chair. If he was honest with himself – he'd want to be alone and watch the casting stars. But, Kaiden did ask him to meet him here to discuss one thing he is not use to discuss: Shepard's abrupt death.

"And I know since Horizon you two –"Kaiden was harping out his frustration, biting his tongue when the word _cheated _came into play. It just made him feel better, more alive that he was wronged by the most dashing woman to cross the galaxy. Garrus just sat back, waited for what Kaiden to say what he had to say about him and Shepard's affair, about how it was the best damn thing Garrus could have hoped for. "I'm just as conflicted." Was all he could manage to squeeze out.

"That so?" Garrus sneered, "You're the one that left her first. Judged her morals as a human. Must be something that someone from a different species could have showed her that. Now – you want to talk about someone who's dead and can't defend themselves. Hell, when you announced your operation to take the Commander's place upon the Normandy, I wanted to snap your head off." Garrus keeps his voice low, though his sub-harmonics threaten to betray him when he eyes the smaller male.

"I make no plan in a replacement. Second in command _is _second in command." Kaiden frowns, but attempts to wipe the feeling off. "And I am not speaking ill about her! The fact of the matter is that I loved her, always have. Possibly for the same reasons you loved her. Even so – she sought you out more, nothing that I did or say could change the wrongs of what happened on Horizon, nor her death. So I'm asking you, no, begging you, please place her name up, and just end it all for us. If you don't – I'll place her name up myself."

Something numbing swooped over, and Garrus could only hang his head. Humans were always so emotional, always so quick to jump to conclusions when something hopeful could accrue. Or maybe, thinking back, when Garrus hunched over to rid himself of the image of Kaiden in front of him, that maybe, Garrus is the one looking through rose-colored glasses – that Shepard was just some ash pile drifting off. "Alright, fine. Just – get the hell away from me right now."

Kaiden shifts his legs, applying weight to the opposite side. He begins to pace to the sensors of the door that swoosh open, standing in the doorway Kaiden pipes up, adding his last bit in the mix to cleanse the aftermath, "You know," he begins, gentle in tone, dogging at him the next, "I'm happy that she went to you. Better than anyone else – I knew you wouldn't let her fall, it's just not your people's way. So," Kaiden hesitates, fingers clutching around the doorframe to stop it from closing all the way, "thank you. Thank you for making her days a little more pleasant. Thank you for not leaving her alone. And thank you for letting go – when no one else wants to."

Kaiden meant well, but there was no pleasantries in hearing about your own mate's fall. Garrus only nodded that he acknowledged Kaiden's peculiar apology. Kaiden finally left the broken man alone.

**-x-**

She's moved across galaxies. Placed as a secret under military watch. She stares up at the plague of stars that swarm in deep vibrant hues of purple and she smiles at the thought. Her hands are clutched by two young ones in the good name of Urdnot Wrex; his and Bakara's offspring. One goes by the name of Mordin (The girl) and the other Shepard (In honor of her.)

Wrex explained that children should be named after valiant soldiers.

The babies are inaudible, but whine just the same as young human children, clinging to the loose robes that she was supplied with to keep the solar sun off her sensitive snow-bone skin. Her hood is drawn and earns its favor to get in her way when she leans her head down to acknowledge the two children gripping and crying for her attention, she simply smiles. Her appearance resembles a monk that crosses the sea of desert, the one that begs and thrives on a prayer.

"Hungry are we?" Her voice rolls off, motherly in tone. That was just her nature though. She guides the children through vast lands of colonization and desert sands and as she walks through the female clan more children begin to rally at her feet and beg for her attention. Listening to every chirp her senses die and she can feel the burden of happiness way on her.

She'll be waiting for her crew. Always waiting. For now, she enjoys the pleasure of civilian life; bathed in the aura of Krogan culture and simplicities.


End file.
